If anxiety and emotional burnout feel like your constant companions, you’re not alone. Autistic people experience stress, overwhelm, and emotional exhaustion more intensely than most because we’re constantly processing too much, too fast, all the time.
Maybe you’re juggling sensory overload, masking, social exhaustion, and daily responsibilities, all while trying to “hold it together” in a world that doesn’t always accommodate your needs. Eventually, it catches up, leaving you drained, overstimulated, and emotionally stuck.
The good news? There are ways to self-regulate… to calm your nervous system, reduce stress, and prevent total burnout. Let’s talk about how.
Why We Struggle with Emotional Regulation
✔ Our Brains Process Stress Differently
- Autistic people often have a more sensitive nervous system, meaning stress builds up faster and takes longer to reset.
- Many of us experience alexithymia (difficulty identifying emotions), making it hard to know what we’re feeling until we’re completely overwhelmed.
✔ We Were Never Taught How to Regulate Ourselves
- Growing up, we were often told to suppress emotions instead of process them—leading to meltdowns, shutdowns, or chronic anxiety.
- We were rarely given healthy tools for coping… just told to “calm down” or “stop overreacting.”
✔ Masking & Code-Switching Drain Emotional Energy
- Pretending to be okay, forcing yourself to socialize, and navigating workplace discrimination all add layers of emotional stress.
- When you have no time or space to recover, burnout becomes inevitable.
How to Regulate Your Emotions & Prevent Burnout
✔ Step 1: Identify Your Triggers & Early Warning Signs
- Do certain people, environments, or situations leave you feeling anxious or drained?
- Notice your early warning signs… irritability, zoning out, muscle tension, feeling “off” but not knowing why.
✔ Step 2: Use Grounding Techniques to Reset
- 5-4-3-2-1 Method: Name 5 things you see, 4 things you touch, 3 things you hear, 2 things you smell, 1 deep breath.
- Weighted objects or deep pressure: Use a weighted blanket, hug yourself tightly, or press your hands together.
- Cold water reset: Splash your face, hold an ice cube, or drink something cold to shift your nervous system.
✔ Step 3: Give Yourself Permission to Feel Without Judgment
- If you need to cry, stim, or take space… do it. Bottling emotions only leads to bigger meltdowns later.
- Reframe self-talk: Instead of “I should be over this,” try “I’m allowed to feel and process in my own time.”
✔ Step 4: Build Recovery Time Into Your Day
- Schedule non-negotiable decompression time between stressful tasks.
- Reduce back-to-back commitments. Give yourself breathing room between work, socializing, and obligations.
✔ Step 5: Use Movement to Regulate Energy
- If you’re stuck in high anxiety, try walking, stretching, or light exercise.
- If you’re feeling shutdown or frozen, try stimming, rocking, or rubbing your hands together.
Self-regulation isn’t about “fixing” yourself, it’s about learning what your mind and body need to function well.
You are allowed to take breaks. You are allowed to prioritize your well-being. And you do not have to push yourself to exhaustion just to meet other people’s expectations.
As always… take what resonates, leave what doesn’t, and know that you are not alone in this journey. ❤